Cherisse Miller has a BA degree in piano performance from the University of South Carolina where she was a student of John W. Williams. She presently studies with Dr. Alan Weinberg at Columbia College. She has taught piano in Columbia, SC for 24 years and presently maintains a piano studio of 37 students incorporating the use of computer technology along with the private lesson. She is MTNA certified and an active member of the National Guild of Piano Teachers, and National Federation of Music Clubs. She is district chairman for the Junior Festival in the Columbia area. She also serves as organist and pianist at North Trenholm Baptist Church in Columbia, SC.
Cherisse Miller
6221 Yorkshire Drive
Columbia, SC 29209
803.783.0657
chopin16@juno.com
I am a pianist, independent piano teacher, and I am the church organist and pianist in a large Baptist church. I am also hearing impaired. My hearing loss is 60-70 percent in each ear, therefore I wear hearing aids in both ears. My world is very quiet without hearing aids, which is the only luxury of not being able to hear. I can turn off the noise when I need too. The hearing population can't do that.
I have poor discrimination ability, caused by damage to the auditory nerve. Hair cell damage in the cochlea affects sound quality and causes distortion of words and music. It is hard for me to understand speech unless I am looking directly at the speaker. When listening to vocal music, live or recorded, it is difficult to understand all of the words clearly. Listening to the radio is difficult. Closed captioning on television allows me to understand more clearly without turning up the volume.
My hearing loss in the low frequency range is mild to moderate, which isn't too bad, then begins sloping off to moderate-severe loss in the mid range, with the majority of my loss being profound in the high frequencies. Since my hearing loss is pretty much nil in the high pitched sounds and I do not hear pitch in the top twenty or so keys on the piano. I hear "thud, thud, thud."
When I play Rachmaninoff's G Sharp Minor Prelude, the ending sounds more like tiny wind chimes tinkling in the breeze. Another piece I learned in high school and a student is learning now is MacDowell's, Shadow Dance. Most of the right hand is played in the upper register and sounds similar to tingly little bells. The only way I know to describe it is, my brain hears the pitches even though physically my ears cannot.
Since being asked to contribute to this issue of Piano Pedagogy Forum, I have asked myself these questions, "In what ways am I different from everyone else, how is the learning process different, how do I adapt, what and how much do I really hear when IÕm making music? How have I, a professional musician with a severe-profound hearing loss, succeeded in a profession where listening and hearing are 100 percent of the job?"
I remember an ad campaign for a hearing aid back in the 1980's, "You Should Hear What You Are Missing." The ad pictured celebrities that were fitted for hearing aids on posters and TV. Their slogan was to tell the country, ' it's OK to wear hearing aids, to come on out of the closet,' so to speak. At the time, I thought, this is so true. If you are not aware of the sounds out there in this noisy world we live in and have never heard the bird's sing, and only hear parts of a conversation, then how do you know what you are missing? What a great statement for the millions of people out there with some degree of hearing loss. Most people do not even realize or want to admit that they have trouble hearing. There are many levels of hearing loss, just as there are levels of piano and forte.
Up until the 80's, there was a lot of negative stigma, and is still some today, towards the deaf and hearing impaired that maybe we were not too smart, since we could not hear. The old deaf and dumb myth. It simply is not true that if you can't hear, then there must be a lack of mentality too. Hearing loss does not affect your IQ.
I can remember during my senior year in high school, my parents asking me, "If we purchase a hearing aid, will you wear it?" I remember thinking, like duh! "do you wear your glasses? You mean I could hear like every body else if I put this little device in my ear?" (Myth: hearing aids are not like glasses or contacts which can restore vision to 20/20. Hearing aids do not restore hearing to 100 percent). Hearing aids can and do enhance hearing and I would be lost without them, but they do not take the place of normal hearing. If they did, everybody would have them!
This is my story ... My Life In A Musical Home
I was very blessed to have grown up in a musical home environment where both parents were musicians. My parents are graduates of the Julliard School of Music; my mother, the pianist, and my father, the baritone. Music was everything and everything was music. Even my name came from a French love song my father sang early in his career. I was probably destined at birth to be a musician.
Despite my hearing loss, I never questioned that I too would choose music as my career or should I say my life. I learned speech, vocabulary, sounds, and was playing the piano before I began losing by hearing. So my love for music was already in my heart long before I knew or understood that I couldn't hear.
I am reminded of the story of the bumblebee. Aerodynamically the bumblebee's wings are too small for him to fly, but he doesn't know that, so he flies anyway. No one ever told me I couldn't play the piano because I had a hearing loss. I just did it!
Learning About My Hearing Loss
I was in my 30's before I learned the true facts about my hearing loss. I grew up thinking I was a little hard of hearing, inheriting this from my grandfather whom could not hear well. The great awakening came during the 1980's. After a visit to the ENT office that tested my hearing as a child in the 1960's, my doctor discovered that I was born with normal hearing, but school testing in 1962 showed my hearing declining.
After some investigation on my part, I discovered that the drug, Chloromycetin, a form of streptomycin, was administered to me in the hospital when I had pneumonia in the third grade. This very toxic drug caused nerve damage in my cochlea, (inner ear) and auditory nerve, which is permanent and cannot be corrected medically or surgically. Nerve deafness occurs when the cochlea and auditory nerves can't properly transmit signals to the brain. Today this loss is called sensorinueral hearing loss. This type of hearing loss not only involves reduction in sound level, or the ability to hear faint sounds, but also affects speech understanding and the ability to hear clearly. I am one of 17 million Americans that are affected with this type of irreversible hearing loss.
I kept my hearing loss a secret for most of my life. Very few people actually knew I wore a hearing aid. I wore my hair over my right ear to hide my little "secret." (I didn't wear hearing aids in each ear until about twelve years ago). I was thirty-five years old before I felt comfortable talking about my hearing loss to friends.
Today, knowing what I know now about hearing loss, I'm amazed I survived nine years of public education with deteriorating hearing and no support or help from the school system. Although my hearing declined gradually during my school years, I'm sure I had special needs that were not met, because programs were not available during the 1960's. The medical society and education system didn't recognize that students with hearing loss even had special needs or could learn in a classroom with support or assistance. Little was known about hearing loss, and hearing aids were not very good back then. My audiologist actually told me that pediatricians often referred children, who had the same type of hearing loss that I have today, to psychiatrists who then would place the children in mental hospitals. The only thing I could in school to hear better was take responsibility for telling my teachers I needed to sit at the front of the classroom. To me this was demeaning and embarrassing.
I coped by learning on my own, (without realizing it), to read lips, watching closely for gesturing, facial expressions, body movement, body language and any other clues to help me understand what was being said. I still use these strategies today. Just like you, we all use our eyes to get clues about what people are saying, their mood, etc. I can "hear", I just can't "understand", everything being said. This is true even with wearing hearing aids.
Hearing Aid Technology
By definition, hearing aids are devices that amplify sound wave in order to help a deaf or hard of hearing person hear sounds more clearly. All hearing aids include a microphone (to pick up sound), amplifier (to boost sound strength), a receiver or speaker (to deliver sound to the ear), and are powered by a battery. Depending on the style, it's possible to add features to filter or block out background noise, minimize feedback, lower sound in noisy settings, or boost power when needed.
I wear behind-the-ear, programmable hearing aids. At the touch of a tiny button I have three different settings programmed for my hearing loss. I can change from hearing in normal settings to a music setting, that is sometimes helpful, to my favorite, "party mode." This setting reduces the background noise in noisy atmospheres like restaurants, stores, large gatherings, etc. and focuses on the person speaking.
I enjoy one-on-one settings and relationships as opposed to being in groups. Group situations are noisy. This could be one of the reasons I enjoy playing the piano so much. I can communicate all by myself. I never considered a career teaching school. A classroom situation would be very stressful to me, because I have trouble hearing across a room. The farther away you are from the speaker, the harder it is to hear the speaker. The intensity, or loudness, of a sound fades rapidly as it travels over distance. The background noise of others talking, paper shuffling, computers, other activities going on nearby, etc. and especially in a classroom situation would be unbearable. These sounds, combined with the lower volume of speech reaching your ear due to the distance factors, make hearing in noisy backgrounds very challenging. I'm much more comfortable with the quieter atmosphere of private teaching.
Growing up, I was very fortunate to have had a Steinway grand at home and at my piano teacher's studio. I acquired my mother's 6' Mathushek grand when I married. This is the piano I now teach on. Several years ago I purchased a very bright 6'10" Young Chang. The piano I play at church is an 8' Baldwin on wood flooring. I prefer grand pianos that are resonant, bright and with full sound quality as opposed to small uprights. Practicing in college was a real shock when most practice rooms only offered old upright pianos. It took several months for me to get use to this change. Understandably, the more a piano has to offer the easier and less frustrating for me to play and hear. You may say the same thing, but to me it makes a big difference. Interestingly enough, an out of tune piano is distracting and confuses me until I get used to it.
I often say about myself, "I hear with my eyes, and play the piano with my ears." I am a visual person, because I can trust and depend on what I can see the majority of the time. I often don't trust what I hear, even when I'm correct, whether playing or conversing. In communicating verbally, sometimes it takes time for me to process the information and to make sense from what was said. It's the same thing when playing the piano. Sometimes my response is slow. I recently performed Rachmaninoff's Suite No. 2, Opus 17 for Two Pianos with my teacher, Dr. Alan Weinberg. There are lots of notes happening at the same time. When practicing with both pianos, if the music was quite busy, I have problems with distortion and sound overload, which can cause me to lose my place on the keyboard because I can't differentiate what I'm hearing and/or playing. Rachmaninoff's use of chromatics and many accidentals at the end of the Romance (Suite), makes it very difficult for me to actually hear if I'm playing the correct notes. Probably the most difficult piece I have ever worked on is Schumann's, Fantasie in C Major, Opus 17. This may be my greatest challenge, to figure out the last two pages of the second movement. The big leaps in both hands, quick tempo, high range has to be difficult even for hearing pianists.
I practice lines that are too high pitched to hear, in a lower register until I hear it in my head. Once my brain learns what it sounds like, and my fingers know where to move I trust myself to play it, even though I may not be 100 percent sure. There is always that little bit of doubt when I play in the high end of the piano.
Playing in church
Being a church musician and accompanist brings on a whole new set of situations. I don't hear the high frequency stops on the organ and I'm sure there are other high timbre of sounds I'm not even aware of. My church has two Sunday morning services. I play the organ for the traditional service and the piano for the contemporary service. Any time amplification is used with electronic instruments, (bass guitar, digital drums, keyboards, vocals on microphones) my ears can become over amplified, so I adjust the volume on my hearing aids to avoid this from happening. Sometimes turning them off is necessary. We use individual monitors and other band members wear earphones, to hear themselves. This helps us cut down on the noise so that I don't become overamplified. I just need to be sure I can hear myself, the minister of music and keep a steady beat. As an accompanist, I've trained myself to anticipate my director's moves and know his tempos. I'm fortunate to work with a great individual who is sensitive and attentive to my hearing needs. He knows to look towards me when giving instructions in rehearsals and I try my best to be attentive. He is patient when he has to repeat a page number or part on my behalf. I know in my heart that using my talents in church is exactly what God has called me to do.
In conclusion, I am who I am because of my love of music, my passion for playing the piano and my joy of sharing it with others. We all have obstacles to overcome no matter what we do. I do wonder sometimes what it would be like to really hear what I was missing - but for right now I'm thankful for what I do hear.
From my teacher, mentor and friend, Dr. Alan Weinberg
Cherisse has been studying with me for about two years. At first, I did not know that she was hearing impaired. She plays the piano so well, and is so musical and technically gifted that I would not have thought that she had a hearing problem. It was only through talking with her that I became aware of her difficulty, by occasionally having to repeat a word or a sentence and finding myself speaking slower and a bit louder.
I gradually learned the nature of her hearing loss which I believe, is twofold: first (and perhaps more apparent), is her difficulty in distinguishing pitches in the upper and lower registers of the piano. Second, perhaps more the result of the hearing aids themselves, is her perception of simultaneous sounds as "two-dimensional." By this, I imagine that Cherisse's perception of the variety and depth of dynamics (distinguishing loud and soft tones in a complex musical texture) may not be as quick and reliable as normal "three-dimensional" hearing where tones readily recede into the background or come to the fore (analogous to a painting that uses perspective to give the illusion of three dimensions).
Nevertheless, she does amazingly well - being able to balance a melody with an accompaniment as well as produce a singing legato tone. In any case, Cherisse has to process what she hears a little longer and sometimes will experience doubt as to what her hearing aids are transmitting to her ears. Needless to say, this can add much anxiety in a performance situation. To help guard against this, Cherisse works hard to thoroughly learn her music by touch and sight as well as sound. In the end, this may not be all that much different from anyone else. We all have our weaknesses that require strengthening as well as inner demons that might cause us to doubt what we are doing. To succeed requires courage and tenacity; but, for the hearing impaired musician, it may take even a little extra than for the rest of us.
Sources:
ASHA, American Speech-Language-Hearing Association, www.asha.org
Carter, Trina, M.Aud., CCC-A
Gale Encyclopedia of Medicine: Hearing Aids, Turkington, Carol A., author.
| TABLE OF CONTENTS |
|---|